How easy it is to try to find comfort in worldly things? How easy is it to become so consumed by the cares of the world that we are numbed to the One that even matters at all? Recently, God has been teaching me just how much I have relied on the pleasures of the world to fill an emptiness that can only be filled by Him. You see, I am constantly reminded of my weakness. And I am constantly trying to drown out my weakness with busyness, the approval of people, romantic relationships, social media, Netflix…rather than going to the One that knows me better than I know myself. The One who, “knit me together in my mother’s womb”(Psalm 139:13). Recently, I’ve been trying to come up with a title for the season I’m in. Something about having a name for my season gives me this hope that I’m at least a little bit in control. I haven’t been able to come up with a name for it, until now. It’s a season of Detox; a season of removing all the idols that I have placed before my gaze, rather than gazing on the Lover of My Soul. And it’s been tiring. Painful. But also, extremely rewarding. I have begun to develop a deep craving that David describes in Psalm 42. I can relate when he says, ” As a deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God.” ( Psalm 42:1). This season was sparked by life group training this past weekend when I was introduced to the video YHWH. I would highly recommend clicking on the highlighted title. This video rocked my world. You see, before I watched this video, I was in relationship with God. I talked to Him. But, I didn’t realize just how much I was bringing idols into the relationship. I didn’t realize how much I would talk to Him, and then try to numb my hurt with Facebook or Netflix. Since watching this video, I realized just how much these attempts were cries out to the Father. In addition to this video, I also recently watched War Room. Although the acting was cheesy, it sparked my idea to create my own ‘Prayer Hut’ under my bed. This spot, complete with twinkly lights and cozy pillows, has become my prayer spot of choice these past few days. It has given me a spot to go when I am made aware of my complete insufficiency and of God’s strength. It was there in that ‘Prayer Hut’ that God told me He wanted me to blog more, so I’m obliging. I don’t know how often I’ll be blogging, but I’d like to try for once a week. I feel like God is going to be molding and shaping me a lot in the near future and I’d love to be able to share these experiences with you.
Thanks for reading,